As it is, not as you would like it to be

My first silent mediation retreat many years ago was life changing. In those ten days I was able to observe my thoughts and conditioning from a place beyond the web of my thoughts. The teacher, S.N. Goenka, offered numerous forms of guidance but he repeated one on a regular basis - “As it is, not as you would like it to be.” It’s certainly not always easy, but I have attempted to live those words as much as possible since that time. Our life unfolds in ways that is often beyond our control. The primary cause of suffering is our resistance to “what is actually showing up in each moment.” We want things to be different than they are. When we stop fighting with reality, we are able to experience an ease and peace - the underlying Presence that underlies everything.

Of course this is not always easy. Some of the ways of shifting from resisting to accepting are:

-Practice gratitude for what you have. At any given moment there are numerous things that are a gift and a blessing. We humans tends to focus on what we don’t have instead of what we do have.

- Focus on your breath. Feel the sensations of the breath in your body - where do you notice it. The breath is always available and is a reliable way to return to the present moment, to let go of the prison of our thoughts.

-Journal what you are resisting. By revealing your thoughts you have a greater opportunity to see how they are not helpful. Often we are so lost in thought that we don’t realize how unhelpful they can be.

-Spend time in the natural world. Nature has a way of helping us become present. If you are not able to go out into nature perhaps you can look at flowers or plants in your environment. Look at the sky, the clouds, the stars or moon. This can put our “problems” in perspective. Spend time with your dog or cat. They are teachers of presence, not caught up in thoughts.

-Recognize that you don’t have to understand why this is happening - that life is ultimately a mystery that we can’t understand.

-Find spiritual readings that help you focus on who you truly are beyond the limitations of body and mind.